There is a bakery/café the girls and I love to go to on occasion for breakfast, a morning snack or sometimes lunch after school. It’s an informal place where I’ve always felt comfortable taking my kids and we have had some really nice conversations and family times there.
Recently I’ve been able to meet other mommy friends at the café with only Doodle, without having to take the girls. Hubby started his 4 week paternity leave and has been keeping the girls so I can have some peaceful socializing.
Usually when I enter the café with my children (who in my possibly skewed mommy opinion are generally very well behaved) I get many stares and sometimes glares as I settle my children in their seats and give them their food. The feeling I often get is that we are a bother to other people or they are waiting for my children to become a nuisance (this occurs not just at this particular café but many places we take the girls). Occasionally someone will make a passing comment about how beautiful my children are (usually a grandmother type) or on their blonde, blonde hair but never anything more than that.
A weird thing has been happening, though. The last few times I’ve been to the café with only Doodle, people are totally enthralled with him. Each visit multiple people ask me how old he is, comment on how cute/big/awake/sweet he is and many people stare at him though usually while smiling and discussing him amongst themselves.
It has been such a change in reception from what I’m used to. It kind of amazes me because generally my girls don’t cry, scream or fuss and Doodle usually does at least once. It’s strange to me that just the size and age of a child elicits such different responses from adults. It’s as if a baby crying is acceptable so long as mom is taking care of it (other than on the airplane, of course!) but the mere sight of a toddler or preschooler is unacceptable and causes people to assume misbehavior will occur. I feel like people accept babies will be babies but assume there is no such thing as a well-behaved toddler.
