Pregnancy is a time of big change for a woman as she gets ready to start a new chapter in her life. Her body will undoubtedly change as will her life. The time is filled with decision making and pondering from how to ready the home to what early life with a new baby will look like and what is important to her as a parent. But one of the most consuming of these thoughts and decisions is how the baby is going to enter the world.
From the moment a woman gets pregnant (or plans to become pregnant) she is making decisions about her future birth. Doctor of midwife? Hospital, home or birth center? Who will be there support her? Medication or no medication? All of these decisions are extremely individual and there is definitely no “one size fits all” answer.
For me, no medication was really the only option for many reasons (I don’t take pain meds in regular life, a needle in my back is terrifying plus I like to be in full control of my body).
The prospect of a natural birth can be daunting, though. The modern media has done a fantastic job of making labor and birth as terrifying as possible and even us confident-in-natural-birth mommies can begin to doubt our abilities.
I prepared for my first natural birth by taking a HypnoBirthing class. I loved the class and learned a lot about how the body worked and felt confident heading towards welcoming Honeybun. Until my due date passed. And until I was pressured into an (unnecessary) induction. I ended up laboring most by myself, hooked up to machines pumping artificial substances into my body and I lost it. And while I avoided the epidural, I did choose to try narcotics (which were horrible! You can read the full story here).
After Honeybun’s birth, as we contemplated #2, I became angry about what had happened and I was determined to make it natural the second time (epidural was still not an option for me and I was NOT going to do narcotics again!)
Where I had taken a laid-back, “my body can do this!” approach the first time, I didn’t leave it to chance the second time and prepared, hardcore. And it worked. I got my natural birth with Sugarplum (full birth story here) and while I didn’t “prepare” with the third time, my preparation from Sugarplum still worked (Doodle’s full birth story here).
I did a number of things while preparing for labor. I prepared myself mentally for the upcoming task by:
1. I regularly listened to the Rainbow Relaxation affirmation that I got in my HypnoBirthing materials. I would listen to it each morning while Honeybun napped. I quickly discovered I responded most to the color purple (a lilac/lavender really) which is color on top of the chakra (the crown and third eye). So I focused all my other preparations around that color as well.
2. I practiced my deep, relaxation breathing since breathing (at all) during contractions was one of the main problems I had during my labor with Honeybun. Deep, relaxation breathing looks like this: Close your eyes, inhale and as you exhale, relax your body. I practiced while listening to the Rainbow Relaxation. Practiced while going to sleep at night. And most importantly I practiced during every Braxton Hicks contraction I could (some came while driving and such which made it harder but I did still try to do the breath just without closing my eyes.)
3. I made myself a soothing soundtrack which I would listen to it at night as I fell asleep (while practicing my breathing).
4. I visualized my color while practicing my breathing. I imagined many different purple things: giant bubbles; mounds of soft fabric; flower petals; ribbons; swinging in a long, flowing dress…
5. I picked a scent (lilac) and would spray some on my pillow before I listened to the Rainbow Relaxation and practiced my breathing.
When it was time to pack for the hospital, I made myself a “relaxation kit”. I put in my music, purple things (scarves, clothes, anything soft and cuddly!) and my lilac spray.
I practiced breathing through my contractions starting Wednesday afternoon. When my water broke at 3:30 in the morning on Thursday, we headed to the hospital. And truthfully, I never touched any of the things in my relaxation kit. I never turned on the music, snuggled my purple or smelled my lilac. But I did continue my breathing.
As we walked the halls, as I labored alone watching TV while hubby searched for a thermometer and as I neared the end and things got tough. All my preparation had worked and I was able to easily relax into my contractions and act moderately normal between.
I did far less actual preparation with Doodle but my labor with him was not much different. I did my breathing and relaxed during contractions and was nearly normal between until then very end.
Both babies entered the world happy and healthy. And whereas Honeybun was a sleepy little thing for nearly a week after her arrival (due to the narcotics) both Sugarplum and Doodle were awake, active, aware and content from the beginning.
