From the first announcement that Pipsqueak was on the way and would be our number four, he’s had a special place in the blog. He’s the only one whose entire being has been chronicled in writing.
Through the morning sickness, hearing his heartbeat for the first time and seeing his cute little figure via ultrasound, I’ve brought my readers along with our journey.
I shared my struggle in trying to balance everyone’s needs from continuing to nurse Doodle while pregnant, watching my girls grow and still trying to squeeze in a little ME time in ballet class.
I wrote out my fears and worries about the health of my pregnancy and then the health of our baby and announced that per my children’s observations we were having a racoon-froggy-footy baby (gender to be revealed at the time of birth) and how I prefer to keep my pregnancies to myself.
We said good-bye to our last grandparent as I began to feel his tiny little life inside me and the reality of Pipsqueak never knowing any of his great-grandparents when his siblings had all known four was hard.
I admitted that I loved pregnancy but that it’s become harder with age and my disappointment in never getting the beauty benefits that are supposed to come with pregnancy.
We moved house and prepared our new home for our new baby. I spent from the first weeks of his pregnancy to the end, anxiously awaiting his arrival as did his brother and sisters as I felt completely out of control.
We spent the summer traveling, first back to Dublin and to visit family in Massachusetts then our last hurrah at Disney where a fall nearly did me in.
I struggled through the end of pregnancy discomforts and anxiously awaited labor as we tried to guess boy or girl and come up with names.
I dealt with judgement when out with my kids and crazy comments while we prepared for a possible tropical storm (and I worried about having a hurricane baby as my due date approached).
I prepared for my planned homebirth and looked forward every week to the possibility of another Thursday baby and when my due date passed, I looked for every possible sign of labor and was DONE!
I let the kids paint my big, round belly and the next night, I wrote through my labor and at 3:30 am on September 4, Pipsqueak was born, his birth leaving me speechless and shared his sisters’ experience of his arrival.
I was overjoyed to finally have him here. I announced his arrival and shared his first few days, weeks and months with us, our new beginning. I was surprised by the reaction to his size and dealt, again, with breastmilk oversupply (this time even worse!)
We settled into life as a family of four as I navigated my days at home and while out and about, realizing baby wasn’t going to stop our lives. I’ve even had time to enjoy having four kids!
I got used to having another boy and struggled with knowing there wouldn’t be another baby girl in my life and time and time again I’ve struggled with him being my last baby.
The past year has flown by as he’s grown and he’s had so many firsts and I know the next year and all his years to come will be even more exciting and I can’t wait to share all of it and continue writing his story!
