The Risk isn’t Gone, Just the Opportunity

“Mommy, can I go outside and play?”
“Sure.”
“Will you come with me?”
“Why do I need to come with you?”
“Because a stranger might come and scooooooop me up!” My three year old makes a sweeping motion and looks to me with his worried eyes.

He’s my scaredy-cat. The same boy that screams when there’s thunder and won’t go in his room alone to get dressed because he’s “too scary!”

My girls are still sleeping and the baby who’s been fighting an unexplained fever for two days and has been up and down since 3:30 this morning is currently down. So here I sit, unable to allay my three year old’s fears of stranger danger. 

It’s not something I’ve ever emphasized, especially at home. My big kids are allowed free reign of the backyard, they can come and go as they please when they please (the baby still requires adult supervision, though, as he’s a dirt snacker). We often play out front with our neighbors and know most of the cars that drive by. I’ve never felt unsafe in our neighborhood.

But last week something happened that’s put doubts in the back of my head. A few neighborhoods over, a boy was almost snatched from his neighbor’s yard while retrieving a ball. He was grabbed from behind but managed to get away.

And while I still think my kids are safe in our backyard, there is that doubt in my head now. There is that need to know where my kids are and to be sure they are safe.

By definition, I’m a millennial mommy (barely and I dispute it!) My generation is seen as the “entitled” generation and we’re looked at as overprotectors and micromanagers when it comes to parenting. While we may not be the same “helicopter” parents of our Gen X predecessors, we are certainly more involved in our children’s day-to-days than our parents were and much more than our grandparents were.

There is no longer that “free” childhood you hear about with kids running around their neighborhoods freely, only coming in when called in at dinnertime. And older generations look down their noses at us for it. “When I was a kid…” and “I turned out just fine…” rings in our ears but we can’t just turn away from the risks we perceive.

Sure, the number of child abduction cases is down (40% lower in 2014 than in 1993) but step back a minute and ponder why that may be…really, think about it…

Is it because there are less “bad” people out there? Less criminals looking to harm children? Or is it actually because there’s less opportunity?

I’m going to say it’s the later. Kids today aren’t out on their own (and if they are, it’s usually reported to the police and the parents charged with neglect).

My kids are growing up in a safer world because I make sure of it. I ensure they’re with a competent adult at all times. I make sure that they’re not out alone where they could be taken whether it’s across the street, at the park, in a restaurant bathroom or at Target. We have a strict “buddy” system (AKA, take a sister with you) and my kids are never alone.

Our world has become a safer place for kids because modern parents are making it that way.